


The Golden Predicament

by Megkips



Category: Magi: The Labyrinth of Magic
Genre: Gen, I Claudius pastiche, Yuletide Treat, a life story by Scheherazade and emperor augustus, how to completely blindside everyone and return to a monarchy, riem was a city of brick i left her a city of marble, the creation of riem as an empire or
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-23
Updated: 2013-12-23
Packaged: 2018-01-05 18:37:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1097311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Megkips/pseuds/Megkips
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>However, Scheherazade, and her display at Actium left August and his magi and with a new quandary: how were they to govern without creating the impression of a kingdom, thus earning the people’s ire and sending the republic back into war?</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Golden Predicament

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hellscabanaboy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hellscabanaboy/gifts).



I.

I. Claudius Drusus Nero Germanicus, This-that-and-the-other (for I shall not trouble you yet with all my titles) who was once, and not so long ago either, known to my friends and relatives and associates as “Claudius the Idiot” or “That Claudius” or “Claudius the Stammerer” or “Clau-Clau-Claudius” or at best as “Poor Uncle Claudius,” am now about to write this strange history of my life; starting from my earliest childhood and continuing year by year until I reach the fateful point of change where, some eight years ago, at the age of fifty-one, I suddenly found myself caught in what I call the “golden predicament” from which I have never since become disentangled.

This is not by any means my first book: in fact, literature, and especially the writing of history, was my sole profession and interest for more than thirty-five years. My readers must not therefore be surprised at my practiced style: it is indeed Claudius himself who is writing this book, and no mere secretary of his, and not one of those official annalists, either, to whom public men are in the habit of communicating their recollections, in the hope that elegant writing will eke out meagerness of subject matter and flatter or else soften vices. In the present work, I swear by Solomon, I am my own mere secretary, and my own official annalist: I am writing with my own hand, and what favour can I hope to win from myself by flattery? 

Moreover, this book acts as a confidential history, addressed not to my contemporaries, my family, or to the citizens of Riem, but to posterity. It is my hope that the generations after my own will feel directly spoken to, as if by a contemporary, consulted as often as the great histories of Xenophon and Theopompus.

My want for such a remote audience is due not to the desire for a lasting name. Some time ago, I visited the Magi of Pescara, a woman who lived in a distant cave along the rocky shores of Riem. She was, in fact, not of Riem’s lands at all, but had turned up in our country all the same. Rather than fret and fuss over king candidates, she gave prophecies based on what she could discern in the patterns of a man’s rukh. I went on a whim while in Pescara, making the perilous journey down to the cave where she sat - a pool of water lit by some underground chamber illuminating her in cold blues, while the rest of the place was in darkness. She was a middle-aged woman - I could not tell you how old, precisely - and sat perched atop a tripod of ivory, green wool garments draped around her. 

I could feel my knees shaking as I approached her, coming to knack together so hard that the noise echoed throughout the chamber. When my mouth opened to speak - for I could feel her gaze upon me - I stammered terribly.

“O Ma...Mag...Mag...” was all that I could muster.

She mimicked me perfectly. “O Clau...Clau...Clau...”

The shame was enough to bring me to my senses. “O magi: I have come to question you about Riem’s fate and mine.”

For a long time, silence filled the cave as the magi sat atop her perch, eyes looking not at, but through me. There had never been, in anyone’s recollection, a magi who could read rukh and predict the future, and few men had spoken of the exact process of her divining technique. I could not tell you if she looked for moments or hours - all I could tell you is that after an eternity, she said this:

The rukh that moans under the southwestern curse  
Is also strangled by the strings of a purse  
And before it mends, it shall flutter, become worse.

Wings will flap, flutter, die  
No man shall mark the day it dies

She paused, then added:

Ten years, fifty days and three,  
Clau-Clau-Clau--shall given be  
A gift that all desire but he.

To a fawning fellowship  
He shall stammer, cluck and trip  
Dribbling always with his lip.

But when he’s dumb and no more here  
Some fifteen hundred years shall pass  
Then Clau-Clau-Claudius shall speak clear.

She laughed when she finished - low, dangerous, and with too much joy. I bowed, as any man must do in the presence of a magi, turned, and made as speedy an exit as possible without breaking into a run. 

Speaking now, as a man who has done some study of magic, and in being familiar with the attempts non-magic users have made to predict the future, I can interpret the meaning with some confidence.

By the southwestern curse, the magi was referring to the so-called curse of Cathargo, a former ally to the southwest that Riem attacked and ended up destroying over the course of three wars. The purse strings refer to the state treasury, and to the richness that Riem gained after Cathargo’s defeat. When they were defeated, we had control over almost all of the trade routes, and Riem amassed a truly remarkable amount of wealth. This new wealth came with increased greed, dishonesty, cruelty, and unchecked desire - all behaviours that are fundamentally against the nature of Riem. The rukh that is said to pass refers to a particular form of government, and how that came to pass will be revealed in the text, as well as what was meant by the gift I will be given and will last ten years, fifty days and three. The lines concerning speaking clear confused me for years, until I sat and considered that my clearest words are the ones that I write. I now understand the lines to be a command to write this present work. When this piece is completed, the scrolls shall be taken out into the desert of Cathargo, with complete trust that it will be found fifteen hundred years later. 

With the preface written, I shall begin. My birth occurred in the 744th year after the foundation of Riem by Remus, and in the 20th year of the Emperor Augustus’ rule.

II.

Before I speak of my family upbringing and of my father - the great emperor Nero Claudius Drusus, whose rule is still spoken of fondly - I must first explain how it was that Riem became an empire, as such actions are tied closely with both matters I have mentioned. To begin: until the rule of Augustus, Riem was a proud republic, free from the tyranny of kings and the whims of unchecked power.

When Augustus - born Gaius Octavian - was young, there had been a civil war between Gnaeus Pompey Magnus - a particularly well respected general and leader - and Gaius Julius Caesar, a nobleman of Riem and esteemed general who went so far as to conquer the northwest region of Galati, beyond Riem’s mountainous border. A great number of histories about the civil war have been written already, so I will not detail the matter here - I will only offer the following summary of how the war concluded: Caesar battled and was triumphant over Pompey, leaving him in complete control if Riem. This control provoked fear in many of the noblemen who made up Riem’s senate, and they feared that that Caesar wanted to establish himself as a king and begin a monarchy - a form of government which Riem had rejected early on. To allay their fears, they formed a conspiracy and murdered Caesar before a session in the Senate was due to begin. His death shocked the people of Riem, and spurred many men into action to avenge his death.

Such men included his loyal general Marc Antony, as well as Augustus - whom Caesar had adopted as his heir via his will. Over the years, Marc Antony and Augustus saw it fit to destroy each and every one of the noblemen who killed Caesar, and took it upon themselves to govern Riem until the war ended. A third senator, Lepidus, joined them, forming a triumvirate. Due to Antony’s popularity with the people, as well as party support amongst the others of the Julian family, he stayed in Riem. Lepidus governed the eastern portion of Riem’s lands under his control, and Octavian was given the south and west, which included the Heliohaput Kingdom and Dark Continent - Riem’s primary source of grain. The division was in Antony’s best interest, as during the civil war, Octavian had proven himself a skilled general, with loyal soldiers who made it clear that they would follow him to the ends of the earth. Peacetime would offer Octavian an opportunity to take over in politics and possibly oust Antony from power, which he was keen to avoid. 

In addition, the assignment allowed Antony some time to speak with Cleopatra - the Heliohaput Kingdom's queen at the time, whom he had met previously when serving under Julius Caesar and taken a liking to. At the time - as is true now - Riem made it its business to leave all ruling traditions in place when taking new territory into its care, be it through war or trade or some other arrangements. Cleopatra was last ruler of the line of Roxana the Great - a princess from the far east who had conquered the outer empire of Kou all the way to Parvia, before dying of fever in Dariopolis - a city she conquered then renamed after her dearest enemy - at age 32. Cleopatra and Antony were also close with each other, enough that for half of the year she was in Riem, with her children by Antony. This allowed Antony a convenient means of passing laws and receiving taxes with no need to contact Octavian - he could simply make such and such suggestion to Cleopatra about a new law, or the need for more grain shipments, and it would be done. 

Octavian spent three extremely long years in Roxandria - the capital which Cleopatra operated out of - frustrated by Antony’s actions. While he was able to influence some legislation in the Senate through dear friends, there was little he could do until his term as governor concluded in another five years.

It is said that he met the magi Scherezade at this time, although there are varied accounts as to how this occurred. The most famous is, of course, that he was wandering the desert outside of Roxandria at night when she, disguised as a beggar, offered him a space beside her fire. He is said to have taken it, and over the course of the evening, she revealed her identity and that he had proven himself a worthy king candidate. There is also the version in which Octavian, sitting in on a trial in Roxandria, caught the magi’s attention when he gave a particularly wise ruling on a case. Supposedly, the question was whether it counted as murder for a master to have left his slave at one of the healing centers in Roxandria with the intent to reclaim the slave if he became better. Octavian ruled that this was murder, not abandonment of property, and that the master in question was to pay a particular fine and free all of his other slaves, since he was not a capable master. Scherezade, impressed, approached Octavian afterwards, and they become close. She only revealed her identity as a magi after they formed a friendship.

The truest one that I have heard was over a dinner some years ago, under the reign of my father. When asked about how she had met Octavian, the magi Scheherazade told the following story:

She was a young woman, seventeen, by her own account, she was visiting Roxandria on a journey of sorts before asserting any authority as a magi. Her theor was that she wanted to see the world and to have a good understanding of how individual countries worked, so that her king candidate could be properly supported. A friend of hers - a Tyrrhenian woman by the name of Ati, whose family moved to Roxandria when Sulla and Marius were at war- was having a dinner party, and invited Scherezade to attend. Other noblemen and women of Riem were there as well, along with Octavian. He was splayed across one of the sofas, wine in hand, when she first saw him, speaking to a military officer about this or that. She turned to her friend Ati, and begged for an introduction - a request that Ati honoured, not questioning why Scheherazade was so insistent about this introduction. Once the officer left, Ati approached, saying to Octavian: “Triumvir Octavian. This is my friend and confidant Scheherazade. She was born in Riem, but spent time with me in Vipsul, before my family left for safer shores. Scheherazade, Triumvir Octavian, amongst other titles.”

Scheherazade made a point to offer her wrist to Octavian and to grasp his, as men do, rather than expect him to rise and kiss one cheek and then the other as one does for a woman. Octavian took Scheherazade's wrist, apparently baffled by the gesture, and smiled in greeting saying, “It is good to meet you. It is very rare that a woman uses only her given nomen with no attachments to her family. Might I ask why?”

“I might tell you if you earn that trust,” Scheherazade said in response. It was at that point that Ati walked away, leaving them to converse. Scheherazade never revealed to us what it was that she and Octavian discussed, but said that she came away from it knowing that if she ever needed to select a king candidate, it would be Octavian. He was young, with ambition, and the ability to wait - a contrast against Antony’s preference for immediate action with no thought given to ramifications later down the line.

After this meeting, the two began to see more of each other. Stories abound that they spent many fortnights in the desert exploring, running into beasts like lamassu (winged bull-lions with the heads of men), whom they spoke with to gain wisdom, and great monsters like ammuts (crocodile-headed beasts that could devour rukh), for no reason other than they needed to have some sort of adventure, lest they grow too restless. Rumour - even as I write this book - holds that they were beloved of each other, but this is not so, and I will explain why this is false here and now: Scheherazade was Augustus’ political ally and dear friend, which is why they never saw each other as a viable marriage, or even compatible in bed. The emotional complications would take too great a toll on their working relationship, and they needed each other to succeed. 

If Octavian - and from here on out I shall refer to him as Augustus - did not know that she was a magi at their first meeting, he likely learned it in their subsequent discussions. While I was never privy to the specifics of them even when I asked Scherezade years later - the results were clear: they had a number of agreed-upon political opinions, and wished to finally act upon them. They both wished Antony out of power - or at least for a different configuration of the triumvirate, they both took issue with the reports coming in from Riem that the city’s roads were falling apart, that drinking water had become contaminated with nothing being done, and that the Senate was slacking in its duty to the people in an attempt to appease Antony. This last part was due in part to the proscriptions which the triumvirate had enacted, killing many of the nobles in order to seize their land and money, thus continuing to fund the state and enabling less resistance to new legislation that they proposed. 

I do not think, as some biographers have suggested, that August and Scheherazade intended to begin a new civil war. Certainly both Augustus and Scheherazade were aware that manipulating the grain supply would anger Antony and turn the Roman populace against him, but I would argue that both saw a proper war as an issue. It would risk revealing Scheherazade’s identity as a magi, and turn the people of Riem against them for threatening to replate the republic with a kingdom.

The manipulation was simple at first - false reports about the grain supply was their first move. That the Dark Continent had two bad harvests was a happy coincidence (and here I must admit that the speculation of Scheherazade being responsible for those bad harvests is impossible to confirm or deny), and it also demonstrated something important: Cleopatra’s now constant presence in Riem rather than Roxandria allowed Augustus some leverage in the situation. Through a series of speeches about the bad harvests, as well as an open letter sent to Antony and the Senate, Augustus was able to point out that the constant reliance upon Cleopatra rather than himself was an affront to his status in the triumvirate, and perhaps to blame for the grain shortage. Relying on a foreign queen rather than a fellow citizen of Riem reflected poorly on Antony, and was now jeopardizing the country’s stability.

For a time, this letter solved things. Cleopatra and Antony parted ways, to ensure the loyalty of Antony to the triumvirate, and to Augustus in particular. He was further expected to prove his loyalty to Augustus by marrying August’s sister, Octavia, and refusing the children that he had had with Cleopatra out of wedlock (twins, a boy and a girl). Together, Octavia and Antony had a daughter - my mother Antonia. However, this union served to underline Augustus’ ambition in Antony’s mind, and shortly after Antonia was born, he resumed his affair with Cleopatra. 

Such a repudiation of his sister - which she took as gracefully as she could; my great-grandmother was unflappable - angered Augustus. He and Scheherazade began to work against Antony by implying that this meant that Antony was no longer interested in the fate of the Riem people, and wished for a vassal queen to rule Riem alongside him. He was able to prove the point when Antony’s will came to light - although how he came to obtain the document remains shrouded in mystery. In the will, Antony named his children by Cleopatra as both his legal heirs, as well as heirs to his position within the triumvirate - a position that was agreed upon to not be hereditary and indeed, was supposed to be temporary until the republic found its footing again.

At this point, war was both inevitable and desirable. Augustus had spent his time in the Dark Continent well. The occasional excursions that he and Scherezade took into the desert expanded to the two leading friends and military officers there to share in their adventures, and where the officers went, their soldiers followed. This gave Augustus a close understanding of Scheherazade's combat abilities, loyal legions, and now, he finally had the support of the people of Riem. In contrast, Antony had loyal legions but lacked the support of the Riem people, who truly believed that he had turned against them in favour of Cleopatra. 

I will not rehash each and every battle here - other historians have done the task for me, and there is no need to do a hackneyed version of their venerable work. However, I will take time to discuss the matter of the Battle of Actium, as it was extremely important for both Augustus and for Scheherazade.

The naval battle was indeed headed by Scheherazade herself - although I need not remind anyone of the capabilities of both sides. Antony’s ships had great rams, reinforced with magic, and grappling hooks that could easily tear holes in the sides of ships. The additional presence of water meant that four trained groups of magicians could manipulate the landscape and create great waves, or else localized tempests to remove individual ships from the fight. Equal to Antony’s forces were Augustus’, who had the same amount of ships - although not all were equipped with battering rams - and had only two magicians to Antony’s four.

The magicians on both side spent a truly amazing amount of energy in order to defend their respective side. It was Scheherazade, with her limitless power, that was able to turn the tide and freeze the seawater around Antony’s ships, making them easy to launch grappling hooks at and thus put massive holes in Antony’s ships. These actions revealed Scheherazade's status as a magi - which lead to its own set of troubles soon after. 

Antony knew that her appearance meant he needed to retreat, and he returned to Roxandria as quick as the winds would allow. He and Cleopatra elected to commit suicide rather than prolong the war, an action that permitted them to preserve their honour. They received funerals in Roxandria with all due rites. 

With both Cleopatra and Antony dead, Augustus was able to take control of Riem in its entirety. I shall note that Lepidus gave no resistance to this - he was hardly a factor in the triumvirate to begin with. However, Scheherazade, and her display at Actium left August and his magi and with a new quandary: how were they to govern without creating the impression of a kingdom, thus earning the people’s ire and sending the republic back into war?

III.

I realize that here I must pause and apologise for the fact that I myself have not appeared in this biography thus far. It would be far easier to explain that such and such happened to me in this particular year, but such actions would be meaningless without the proper context - hence the previous chapter’s focus. I should note that this is due to my desire for not only a complete history of myself, but an honest one about how Riem changed from republic to monarchy, and the role that not only I, but my entire family played in making it so.

To return to the question that Augustus and Scheherazade faced: they were able to appease the Senate and people of Riem by expanding the role magi in government. They took the concept of selecting a king candidate, and suggested that this could be applied to a republic. Rather than select a single king, the foresight and skills of a magi could be used in elections, in order to confirm the skill of a candidate for this-or-that public office. With Scheherazade approving all potential participants in Riem’s government, it would be possible to regain a Senate of honest men, and restore the moral order that Riem had lost thanks to the civil wars. This would also help to create a better public image of Riem in the eyes of others, and ensure that all of the legislation passed in the Senate was done out of genuine concern for the people and for the character of Riem, rather than individualistic greed. This argument - made not by Scheherazade herself but by Augustus - won the people over to his side entirely. The Senate’s opinion on the matter was decidedly mixed, and so the rehaul was done slowly. Current senators were not forced out of their seats, but were often replaced when their term was up by new challengers, each of whom were required to undergo inspection and approval by Scheherazade before campaigning. The method used to approve candidates for office is a matter still kept secret, as Scheherazade continues her work in this manner. Their excursions to fight great beasts, as they had done back in Roxandria, decreased at this time.

Through this slow turnover in the Senate, a number of Augustus’ reforms began to be passed, including the taxation of single men who failed to marry, repairs to the many roads that had fallen apart over the years, and a great number of public works projects that glorified both Riem and Augustus. 

It was also at this time that Augustus wed - taking Livia Drusilla as his wife. He had been married to a noblewoman named Scribonia previously, but understood that Livia’s family would offer him a stronger place in politics. That Livia had taken the time to study all of what Augustus sought in a woman - they traveled in the same social circles, meaning there was ample time to observe his flirtations - was also no coincidence. I do not understand why it was that Livia desired power, but it is simple truth that she achieved it. She married Augustus after he divorced his first wife, and so became the second most powerful woman in Riem. 

Livia brought her sons Tiberius and Nero Claudius Drusus - my father - into the marriage. Livia made it clear from the outset that she had dynastic ambitions, which Scheherazade took issue with. Oddly though, for all of her dislike of Livia, Scheherazade never disapprove of the marriage - even when she was given the opportunity to do so. She was, in fact, consulted about the marriage before it occurred, as Augustus desired her opinion. She made it clear that although she appreciated the respect of her friend, she saw the match as a personal decision to be undertaken only by Augustus, rather than a political matter she needed to weigh in upon. Augustus was hurt by Scheherazade’s lack of enthusiasm for the match, but did not comment upon the matter. 

Scheherazade’s constant presence in Augustus’ household quickly became a bone of contention for Livia, who perhaps was one of the first people to suggest that Scheherazade and Augustus were having an affair. I know - and know because the argument often echoed throughout the household walls that I grew up in - that Scheherazade and Livia frequently fought over political decisions that one or the other made. Scheherazade’s ability to approve candidates for office often meant that individuals Livia favoured were rejected, and the accusations between the two so often boiled down to, “You are a threat to the republic!” The claim, of course, was not untrue on either end: after his marriage to Livia and the improvement that Riem had undergone, the notion of Augustus as the first citizen became more and more appealing. Senators who favoured Augustus’ policies were placed into the running for office with greater frequency, slowly but surely making a monarchy acceptable again. Where the difference lay between the two women was the question of where the loyalty of the individual lay: Scherezade to a stable government regardless of form, and Livia to a stable monarchy that she just so happened to have had a hand in creating.

The disagreement between Livia and Scheherazade came to a head when it became clear that Augustus wished to retire from office. Livia spoke to Augustus about naming her son Tiberius as the heir, as Tiberius was a skilled general, and more susceptible to Livia’s manipulations. When Augustus asked Scheherazade about the matter, making it clear that while he was inclined towards naming Tiberius to the office, he desired a second opinion, she said in response: “Between Tiberius and his brother Nero Claudius, I believe the latter would be better. He curries more favour with the people, and shows a stronger head in matters of state.” Scheherazade made no mention of Livia’s dynastic ambitions - not here, or ever, so far as I am aware - although no one is sure why. Many have suggested that it was out of fear of drawing Livia’s anger or else leading to a divorce between Augustus and Livia, which would have ruined much of Riem politically. My own understanding is that Scheherazade did not wish to upset Augustus by revealing that the main reason that his wife had wed him was to further her own ambitions. No one likes to hear such things about their spouse, and no friend would wish to bring such unhappiness to someone they care for. Thus, Scheherazade remained silent.

 

IV.

This brings me now to my father, the emperor Nero Claudius Drusus. I have written a biography of him before, so most detail I provide of his birth until his accession to the throne will be brief. Moreover, from here on out I shall refer to him as Drusus, for the sake of clarity.

My father was the son of Livia’s husband Tiberius Claudius Nero - who shall hereout only be referred to as Drusus’ father - and was born three months after Livia’s marriage to Augustus. He was brought up within his birth father’s household rather than Augustus’, and shared a close bond to his brother, Tiberius, who shall come up in greater detail later on.

To return to the matter at hand: my father and his brother were both doted upon by Augustus, as it was clear that both would be destined for public office. This meant that they were expected to complete extensive military duties, as well as take up important roles within the household of Augustus. Drusus married my mother Antonia, and had my older siblings Germanicus and Livillia by her, as well as myself and two children who did not survive infancy. While my brother and sister were born in Riem, I myself was born in Lyon, Galati, while my father was acting as a magistrate there on behalf of Augustus. My mother followed my father on every campaign, as did the rest of the family. This meant that my brother and sister - five years and one year my elder, respectively - were of hardy constitutions. Any child who survived had to be. I myself was barely so, having fallen ill three times before the age of two. Had my father not been recalled to Riem shortly after, I doubt that I would be writing this history. 

Much of my early years were characterized by sickness - I was born two months premature, reacted so poorly to my wet nurse’s milk that I broke out in a rash, then battled with malaria and measles,rendering me slightly deaf in one ear. This was followed by erysipelas, colitis, and infantile paralysis which left me with a limp on my left side. No magic was able to cure any of these ailments when I was young, and since then a large amount of my travels have relied on sedan chairs, or else not moving at all. 

To speak bluntly, my mother had no love for me as a child - a contrast to the caring upbringing that she had received from my grandmother Octavia. Rather than take extra caution in regards to my illness and misfortunes, I received only the bare minimum care that would be expected, and my mother made no attempt to conceal her general dislike of me. My sister Livillia followed my mother’s example. My father Drusus, however, attempted to keep ensure that I was in fair health and had some semblance of an education. The emphasis on my education was due to the interference of my beloved brother Germanicus, who offered me sympathy and served as my chief protector as I grew. It was he who often confronted my mother when she mocked me - never in front of my father, of course - and he who first recommended that I be given a better tutor after seeing me read books that were considered beyond my ability to read. My grandmother Livia made no secret her dislike of me either - only telling me to get out of her way if ever our paths were to cross.

Augustus disliked me, but unlike many others, never went out of his way to treat me cruelly. He simply looked nervous whenever we shared a room, and it was clear he had a preference for young boys in good health. He often was seen with Germanicus, or else the little princes from abroad that Riem had taken hostage, speaking amongst them like an excited boy himself. It was around cripples, dwarves, and myself that he became visibly uncomfortable, and as such, lengths were gone to in avoiding any confrontation.

There is, then, the matter of Scheherazade, who to this day I am unsure what to make of. It was not uncommon for her to be in our household in Riem, in order to speak to my father. On occasions that she was asked to wait - he might be in the middle of another meeting, or else gone somewhere within the city to attend to business - she would sit in the courtyard and speak if any of us approached her. Germanicus approached her every time that he could, and would ask her a great many questions about her travels, or else about the battles Augustus fought, or the reign of Julius Caesar. She would answer him with patience, smiling as if she saw something that he did not. My mother discouraged me from doing the same - there was no reason for a sickly thing like me to burden such an important government official - but several times I dared. The first, I stuttered so badly that she must have thought I was an idiot, although she humoured me all the same by pretending that I was speaking normally and answering my questions. The second time I approached I was eight and had gained some control over my stammer. She saw me walking towards her and greeted me warmly, inviting me to sit. Against all odds I was able to thank her for the honour, and she questioned me about my schooling: if I liked my tutors, what it was I was reading, and what I thought of the material. I replied that while my tutor Cato was respectable, I did not enjoy his methods, and found his choice of material to be dull. Before she could reply, my father appeared so that they could speak, and she left with a simple farewell.

The very next day, Athenodorus the philosopher became my new instructor, with no explanation for the change. I did not speak to Scherezade again for several years, and when I thanked her for assisting in replacing Cato as my tutor with someone kinder, she laughed and said that she had no idea what I was speaking of.

To return to my father: once he got back to Riem, he was voted consul, alongside his brother Tiberius. The reason for this was clear: it was an attempt to determine who would be a more likely successor for Augustus. Both men knew that, and were careful not to appear any better or worse than the other. The unity between the two was praised by the Senate and by the people of Riem, but proved frustrating to Augustus, Livia, and Scherezade. Livia in particular found this irritating as she had great hopes for Tiberius. The man had married Julia, Augustus’ only daughter, and Livia easily ruled him. Tiberius following Augustus would assure a steady dynasty that she could control - Drusus was resistant to Livia, and had a greater love for the notion of a republican Riem. It was by fortune that the German tribes at the border of Riem had begun to encroach again, using their beloved monsters to attack us. These creatures, whose name no one in Riem can pronounce, are great serpents. The Germanic tribes understood them all to be the offspring of one great “world” serpent, and while I can’t say the belief is true, I can understand where the theory came from. These creatures were (and are) about fifty cubits in length with green or black scales, with the ability to travel through bogs and on dry land. Their size makes them capable of swallowing men whole, and the tribesmen of Germania learned long ago that they can tame these creatures and use them in battle. To say that they are fearsome beasts would be an understatement. The best way for them to be defeated is with legionary magicians, and as such, those men (and women; a legionary magician is the only open position in the military for women) are in high demand along the border. 

Both my father and Tiberius were sent to quell the matter, in hopes that one would prove to be more skilled in matters military than the other. Again, my mother brought all of us to the Rhine with my father, where we remained until the border was secure. Germanicus was beloved by the legions and treated with the greatest respect, as if he was one of them already. My sister was given all due respect to her station, and I was simply permitted to walk around the camp when I could. The soldiers often humoured me with conversation, and made a number of bawdy or else inappropriate jokes in my presence, which I came to understand many years later. Such experience has paid off for myself in my current position, as it has allowed me to understand the mood of the troops as they have conquered the far north.

With the border stable again, Tiberius and Drusus returned to Riem. It was at this time that Tiberius decided to retire to Rhodes suddenly, offering no explanation of why - only that he desired to do so. Livia, certain that the problem was Tiberius’ marriage to Julia, was enraged by Tiberius’ departure, and doubly so that Augustus allowed it. To her, this was a sign that Drusus was more and more likely to be Scheherazade's next king-candidate-in-everything-but name, which would utterly end her dynastic ambitions. Rather than show her anger though, Livia worked alongside Drusus whenever the opportunity presented itself. Augustus was slowly but surely removing himself from public office, trusting the two of them to administer in his place, with him going so far as to give both copies of his signet ring so that they could conduct business.

These years were the happiest of my own life. Excluding Germanicus, my family left me alone. With Athenodorus as my instructor, I quickly showed myself to be a skilled student in history: I had knowledge of both the common language and Toran, and had mastered enough of my stammer that I could orate if I concentrated very hard. My compositions were considered acceptable, and I was given assignments to write small histories - often of family lines - in order to familiarize me with the style of contemporary historians, and the process of research. I learned to navigate the library of Riem with skill, and spent time there as often as possible. 

Germanicus, when he could, would sneak me into the gymnasium where he studied, so that I could sit in his courses and observe. This was permitted only because I was Germanicus’ brother. The secret remained as such, and Germanicus and I enjoyed the rare chances we were afforded to study side by side with each other.

My brother came of age in a magnificent ceremony when he was fifteen. I was pleased for him, and was happy to watch him parade through the streets to the Temple of Solomon’s Wisdom, where he traded in his childhood gown for that of a man - a wonderful blue garment made of the finest spun wool, the embroidery detailing the life of Riem’s founder, Remus. Of course, the long walk meant that I could not participate in the procession myself, but I was happy to watch from afar. Five years later, my own ceremony was done in the middle of the night, with as few people present as needed.

Ah, but here I must pause the narrative of my own life, and discuss the death of Augustus, which occurred on the nineteenth day of the eight month - which now bears his name.

V.

In discussing Augustus’ death, allow me to explain that for some time, he had been ill at heart. His daughter Julia - who was wed to Tiberius - did not follow her husband to Rhodes, and had several affairs in his absence. I will note here and now that Julia had two sons whom Augustus doted on - Lucius and Gaius, both of whom died young. Julia’s affairs were hidden from Augusts, somehow, and upon the revelation that they had been going on for years and years, he sent Julia into exile. This loss, combined with the earlier death of his grandchildren, left him profoundly upset.

This sense of loss was made worse by the matter of a returned exile. I had hesitated to explain this earlier, as it is something that is forbidden to speak of, but since this account is supposed to survive and outlast all of us, I have concluded that my hesitation is necessary. The exile in question was Scherezade's biological son, born out of wedlock, named Postumus. Whose bastard he was, no one knew, and she did not ever name the boy’s father. He was roughly between Germanicus and myself in terms of age, and one of - Germanicus’ schoolfellows, which was how he and I met. I proved to him that I was loyal and true by helping him with his studies, and for this I was always seen as a friend. Augustus treated the boy like family regardless of the fact Postumus was a bastard, which Livia disliked immediately, but could do nothing about. On some level, she likely saw the boy as a threat to her own lineage, or at least as another means for Scheherazade to exercise her influence.

Postumus was exiled for the attempted rape of my sister Livillia - a charge that I later learned was fabricated. At the time of the accusation though, Scheherazade was shamed by her son’s behaviour, and the whole affair caused the public to question her ability to appoint the best men for Riem’s rule. She withdrew from public life for a year, giving Livia more power in administering Riem. This temporary shift resulted in the rumour that Livia had set the whole thing up. Germanicus and myself remained quiet about our opinions of the matter.

This matter relates to Augustus’ death because several weeks before he died, a rumour surfaced that Postumus had managed to contact his mother and leave his island of exile. Augustus had left Riem at the same time these rumours occurred, then returned, giving no precise reason for his trip. Scheherazade remained in Riem. When asked if she knew where Augustus had gone, she admitted ignorance. No one knows if they truly met or not.

Before returning to Riem, Augustus visited Nola - the birthplace of his biological father. No one knew the reason for the stop, but it proved to be fatal, as once he arrived there, his health took a turn for the worse. His stomach began to reject food so violently that he could not keep down even the weakest of broths. With such a weak constitution, Livia insisted on feeding him herself - figs from her private garden, thin soups, weak wine. In spite of all of these precautions, Augustus’ health continued to deteriorate. He knew that he was dying, and asked that both my father and Scherezade attend to him at Nola. At his death bed, he asked for Scheherazade’s judgement about Drusus succeeding him, which she gave readily. My father, speaking of the scene years later, said that Scheherazade and Augustus then embraced, as brothers do, not weeping, but holding each other close. Livia, he said, did not look envious, and waited for Scheherazade to release Augustus from her embrace. Thus it came to pass that Augustus died in Livia’s arms, thanking Scheherazade for all of her support, extolling Riem’s people for their love, congratulating himself for the improvements that he had brought to the city, and praising Solomon for allowing him to accomplish all that he had during his lifetime, stating that he had been able to play his part well.

I remember how I learned of it: I had been napping in my garden, having finished some writing. Two senators came to me, apologised for the interruption, saying that the matter was urgent. When I asked what the matter was, they said it simply: “Augustus is dead.” Half asleep, registering the meaning of their words, I murmured, “Poison is queen,” before coming to my senses. With a hasty apology given for such nonsense being uttered in my sleep, I asked what I might do for them. 

As members of the Order of Knights, they needed a representative to the Senate, and wished for me to have that honour. I accepted, and pleaded the order’s case for the honour to bring Augustus’ body back to Riem. I did so in front of the Senate - the first time I had ever spoken during a session - without stammering or slipping over my words.

Postumus’ body was found a week after Augustus’ death. He was stabbed in the gut and in the back multiple times. His mother was his only mourner.

VI.

To say that Riem had issues coming to terms to Augustus’ departure would be an understatement: it was as if the universe itself had shifted, and was now rolling to try and adjust to the new position, waves coming and going until stillness returned. During this time, my father Drusus took over for Augustus in all offices. In private, he was uneasy about his new position, feeling ill with the amount of power that had come to reside in one man. However, to refuse these offices would create chaos, so my father accepted them all without complaint. He took over and continued many of Augustus’ programmes, especially public works such as the repair of old roads and creation of new ones continued, along with many public buildings including theatres and baths. 

Much of my father’s reign was peaceful. My studies gave way to my writing several books - the first being a history of my father’s campaigns, which he approved and had frequent public readings of, the second and third being histories of Tyrrhenia and Cathargo respectively. I moved from Riem to Capua, living on a small farm.

I was also married at this time, to a woman named Herklaina. The match had come about through Livia, who was a friend of my wife’s mother, a high born Tyrrhenian woman named Herkla. While my wife’s name was a diminutive of her mother’s, there was nothing diminutive about her. She was as thick as a tree trunk - tall where I was short, with great muscles and a ruddy face. Our marriage had been arranged because it amused my grandmother and Herklaina’s mother to do so, and we spent no time together save for our wedding night. We had a son, also Drusus, but I could not find any love for him, and he was raised in my mother’s care.

To return to Capua. I took to the company of a prostitute, Calpurnia; a truer companion than I could have asked for. She was more honest than any noblewoman in Riem, more loyal a friend than I had had outside of Germanicus, and in spite of being paid to stay in my company, regarded me on the same close terms that I did her. She assisted with my writing, with running my household, and had a tongue so sharp that I often joked that she must sharpen it on a whetstone.

During this time, my brother Germanicus was assigned the command of troops in Germania, moving his family with him. He had taken a wife in our second cousin Agrippina (hereafter Agrippina the Elder), and had six children with her, including Gaius, who the soldiers called Little Boots - Caligula. While in command there, Germanicus put down a particular rebellion, when the soldiers were informed that their years of service before retirement would now be twenty, rather than sixteen. It is my understanding that this matter was debated hotly in the Senate before passing, and that the only reason it had gone through was that it had enough votes that my father Drusus could not veto it - to do so would appear to be acting as a king.

The soldiers in Germania called for my brother to take the place of my father, which Germanicus refused. This display of loyalty from son to father reflected well on them both - our father had raised a fine son, and my brother had the deepest respect for our father. While remaining in the area, Germanicus went on to defeat many barbarian tribes that quarreled on the border of Riem. The magicians under him developed new means to combat the Germanic serpents, and indeed, managed to perfect their destruction to an art, to the point where it was rumoured that the creatures might disappear from the face of the planet in a few more years. This also led to Germanicus being called the avenger of the soldiers lost during the Varian Catas Catastrophe - an attack by Germanic tribes that destroyed four of Riem’s legions, plus auxiliaries. Soon after, my brother recovered two of the three missing standards that had been captured during the Varian Catastrophe, cementing his status as a hero to his legions and to the people in the capital. My father proceeded to send a note to my brother, saying that he should return home for a triumph, but my brother insisted on continuing his campaign for another season. This was permitted.

The loyalty of Germanicus’ troops, and the favour that he curried, began to become a concern for Livia at this time. With Tiberius gone and Drusus in power, she had little influence, and it was clear that Drusus would be succeeded by his son, rather than his brother. Livia’s influence would soon only extend to the royal household - unacceptable, as far as she was concerned.

Eventually, Germanicus was reassigned to fight in the east - which was a decision that Livia influenced. How she managed to reassert such control over politics I shall explain now, and cite my source in a short while. Livia dined with Drusus one night, and the matter of Germanicus’ campaigns came up in discussion. Drusus commented that he was proud of his son, only for Livia to voice concern that while it was good of Germanicus to rid Riem of its barbarian problems, it would be unwise for him to only focus on the backwaters of Riem’s territory. There was a need for him to learn of the other peoples within Riem’s borders, and to learn to deal with them as well. After much debate of where to send him, it was agreed that Germanicus would be reassigned to a post in the south, after a brief return to Riem.

The recall upset Germanicus greatly, as was made clear when I went to meet him in Riem. When we spoke, he admitted that he was concerned that this recall was about how his legions. It was the only melancholy moment during of our meeting though. I told him of my current writing projects, and he told me of his many battles, asking if I would object to recording them in a history one day. In response, I promised that I would begin work immediately. These scrolls exist, of course, but have not been published. I include them alongside this biography, to ensure their survival.

This was also the first time I met my nieces and nephews, including Caligula. They were all reserved children, raised to respect their elders. Caligula had a tendency to speak out of turn at dinner, and responded poorly when asked to be quiet though, which caused my brother some embarrassment. 

In the south, my brother achieved greater victories, adding new territory to Riem’s holdings. His children thrived there, and we thought that all was well, until he suddenly grew ill - seemingly overnight. There was talk of poison at play, although for a time, his illness apparently subsided. He had found comfort in charms and wards against magic, although this quickly stopped when strange omens began to appear in his house. Dead bodies goats and chickens - mutilated, then burnt - appeared hidden under tiles in the house, driving my brother’s already fevered brain into a state of frenzy. No amount of bedrest could help his symptoms, nor could any doctor or magician. Most of us were unsure of how these omens were coming into the house, given that he had employed magicians to apply every known defense to his household in order to ward off harmful magic. My father was to leave to visit my brother on the day that my brother died of his fever.

I will not write of the return of my brother’s body, or about his funeral - the grief is too great to bear. It is suffice to say that all of Riem mourned with my family. Germanicus’ children came under our father’s protection, and were treated with love by both my family and all of Riem. 

VII.

I returned to Riem for my brother’s funeral, but left soon after. The city’s grief was too much to bear, and I could not look any of my family in the eyes. The only two people who seemed sober were Livia and Scheherazade, and the chief reasoning for this was that they feared what the other might do with this opportunity to gain power.

My father Drusus, like Augustus before him in the matter of Julia, fell into a deep melancholy. My mother was given the task of raising Germanicus’ children, and my father continued to withdraw from everyone, leaving the administration of Riem in Livia’s hands. He continued to appear at all ceremonies, and games, and greeted monarchs to discuss whatever matter was needed, but there was no joy in him anymore. He simply went through the motions of life, drowned by his grief, and it broke my heart that he never recovered from the loss of my brother.

Livia, for all her plans, was as capable an administrator of Riem as any - having learned much of the ins and outs under Augustus and observing them from Drusus. As a point of irony - which I will explain later this chapter - she signed no death warrants, and played the part of a woman who was asked to take on a great duty on behalf of her mourning family very well.

This was the first and only time that Scherezade left Riem. She withdrew to Rapci, where she had a villa, as not to provoke Livia and begin another war. Many went to visit her at that time, but she made no interference with the running of Riem, and there was no communication between herself and Livia, which suited both women just fine. 

During this time, I remained in Capua, writing, and left to mourn my brother in my own fashion. I wrote a complete biography of him - careful to not fall into the trap of praising him, since I cannot have bias as a historian - but did not publish it. To do so so soon after his death would only anger people, and compound their grief - it is to be published after my death. I continued to write my histories of Tyrrhenia and Cathargo and entertained the few friends who came to visit me every several months.

Once, I was summoned to Riem to dine with Livia, on her invitation. Given her past preference of ignoring me, or treating me cruelly, as she had done with my marriage, I was unsure of what to expect. Surely another joke was to be played on me, but that she had taken the time out of her now extremely busy schedule to express the desire to dine with me meant that I could not refuse the invitation. Dutifully, I traveled from Capua to Riem, and dined with her on the day she had specified.

The only other person joining us in the room was Caligula - now fifteen years old. I was greeted warmly by my grandmother, and she asked after my work in earnest. My response was to inform her of the histories of Tyrrhenia and Cathargo that I had completed. She refilled my wine cup personally each time it was drained. I had half a mind to be concerned about this, but I was too content to speak and be respected by my family to remark on it. I must have had ten or eleven cups within the first two hours of the meal, otherwise I would have been completely aghast by the question she asked of me, which was: “Do you dislike me, Claudius?”

“No more than you dislike me, grandmother,” I replied, emboldened by the wine. Rather than be reproached for an honest response, she laughed, pleased with it.

“Very good,” she said, before gesturing to my nephew. “Have you noticed the monster that we have dining with us? His silence this evening is quite unusual.”

My eyes glanced to him for a moment, before returning to Livia’s. “I was not aware he was a monster.”

“You’ve been in Capua too long,” she observed dryly. “Of course he’s a monster. Aren’t you, boy?”

Solemnly, Caligula spoke: “Whatever you say, great-grandmother.”

It reaffirmed my thought that this was all a joke, and that the punch line would come soon. My grandmother’s next words only went on to prove my hypothesis - or at least, that was what I thought when she first said, “That little monster there, that nephew of yours, will become the next ruler of Riem.” Seeing the disbelief on my face, she added, “Don’t be so surprised by the matter. Drusus has proven himself quite useless since he went into mourning, and I will not last forever. A young man is the next logical successor, and with a beloved father whose memory he can invoke, it will be inevitable. And don’t mutter about that magi’s opinion being important - she’ll not get along with him, and all of her advice will be ignored by this monster. He’s already proven himself to be capable of things that none in our family could imagine.”

Caligula interrupted again, this time pleading. “Please, great-grandmother, no more.”

She laughed at the request, ignoring it entirely. “You secret is safe with me, monster.”

“May I ask, at least, how you have come to know that he will become Emperor?” I asked.

“That magi down in Pescara told me so, and she has never been wrong,” was the response, certain. “Which is in part why I have called you here tonight, Claudius. You two must get to know each other better. Caligula, know that your uncle here swore to protect all of his brother’s children - even you - and as such will never betray you, such is his love of honour and greater love of his dead brother. Likewise, Claudius, know that this monster here will be cruel, will trick and humiliate you, but will never kill you. In fact, the Magi of Pescara has said that he will be the one to avenge your death.”

“And you are certain of all of this?” I asked.

“As I said, the Magi of Pescara is never wrong,” Livia replied. “Monster, you may leave. The rest of this discussion is between Claudius and myself.”

Dutifully, and I suspect relieved, Caligula left us. The servants - deaf mutes, I was told by my grandmother - stayed as still as statues, and our conversation continued. “That was,” I began, “not simply the wine gone to my head?”

“This has all been a perfectly serious conversation,” she informed me. 

“May I ask if the magi said that Caligula's appointment will be made by official authorities?” I did not dare not mention Scheherazade by name, but Livia followed my gist easy enough. She laughed, saying, “Of course not. The magi said that she will abstain, and with reason. I expect you’ll figure out why easily enough.”

I didn’t know at the time, but in retrospect, it was quite obvious. Non-approved emperors would bring destruction and ruin to Riem, whereas those that Scherezade approved would bring prosperity, cementing her place as a magi and making the appointment of emperors by her acceptable to Riem’s populace. “How do you relate to all of this?”

“I consult the Magi of Pescara frequently. She told me everything that would happen with Drusus, although I did not believe the good fortune at first. She added that I would die happy, but that my legacy would fade quickly, due to that wretched magi - me, who helped bring Riem into its current state of magnificence! That I should have no honours given to me, when I have earned my place alongside Augustus, and certainly more than your father, spoken of only as a wife rather than as a ruler myself, I cannot abide. I have done terrible things, but in the recognition of the good that was brought about through them, my rukh will rest easy. But that cannot be done unless the emperors that follow me elevate me to the proper status. Caligula has promised me this, and now I ask you to do the same.”

There was something desperate to her demand that I could not ignore, but I also could not help but respond thusly: “I shall, on one condition.”

“You dare to make conditions?”

“After nearly three decades of abuse and neglect, am I not permitted?”

She smiled thinly in concession. I continued. “There are a great many things I would like to know about that transpired here, during Augustus’ rule, my father’s, and yours. I want the truth - not for vengeance, but for the satisfying of curiosity. I am a historian, and that is the reason I ask, although I will not breathe a word about the matter.”

“Very well.”

I could not tell you how long the questioning went on. She answered each and every matter patiently, as if the matter had happened only a day ago, and was able to confirm much of what I have written in this book, including the matter of Postumus, being responsible for Augustus’ death, the great many rumours circulated concerning Scheherazade, and many more minute matters that I have excluded from the narrative. She explained her light touch - working through Herklaina’s mother, who was able to gain information through sources that not even Livia knew about - and that each death was for the good of the empire. Always the empire, never the republic.

By the end of the evening, I had all of the information that I could have asked, although even she admitted she did not know how Germanicus’ madness had come about, and that she had no hand in it. I thanked her for her patience, genuinely grateful, and left for Capua the next morning. My head spun when I woke, and the entire time I sat questioning the events of the previous night, unsure if they had even happened.

IX.

Livia passed about three years later. Her funeral was suitably grand, although you could not have told that my father was in mourning. I myself attended, unsurprised that Scheherazade was not there. Caligula read the funeral oration, and some expected that he would begin his reign then and there, with my father abdicating. As it was, Caligula had a positive reputation amongst the people of Riem - much of it was good sentiment carried over from their mourning for Germanicus. He did not take advantage of this, and spent his time idly. The responsibility of governance returned to the many small offices that Augustus had set up early on, and there were no changes made to the structure or running of Riem.

My father’s death was utterly unremarkable: he died in his sleep, at the age of seventy seven. With no indication of who was to succeed him, and Scherezade still absent from affairs, Caligula was voted all of Drusus’ honours and responsibilities by the Senate, which he accepted without contest. In Drusus’ honour, he held great games for a fortnight, thus cementing the love of the people. I was also invited to return to Riem by Caligula, which implied that he had taken Livia’s suggestion that we become close. I was forced to return, as the request could not be refused. I gave the money that I had been left in my father’s will, and most of my other possessions, to Calpurnia. This was on purpose, as Caligula had been spending freely and frequently. Calpurnia, infinite in her wisdom, pointed out that the treasury would run dry soon and that men of wealth would be drummed up with false accusations of being traitors, and a return to proscriptions. She managed my affairs in my absence, and I resumed life in Riem’s capital.

There will be, I am certain, a great number of exaggerations concerning Caligula’s madness. Permit me to set the record straight: he spent greatly, mostly on games, but also did work for the public good, particularly in the building of aqueducts. When the southern provinces rebelled, he put them down, and he replaced the property of people who lost homes or business in fires. He sent Riem into a spending crisis, as he built great ships for himself and spent too much money gambling, and feuded with the Senate, to the point where he tried to make fun of them. He did this by making his beloved horse Incitatus a senator, which was taken as well as one might expect. 

With that said, I will try to explain the two most common charges leveled against him: incest, and his insistence that he was Solomon reincarnated.

The first one I cannot confirm or deny, and I am loathe to speculate on the matter at all. My nieces were all supremely unhappy living at the palace, and while Agrippina and Livilla were permitted to bring their husbands with them, Drusilla was not. There were plenty of moments that Caligula behaved inappropriately towards her, although Livilla strived to be in mixed company whenever possible. 

About one year into Caligula’s rule, Scherezade returned to Riem proper. She was often in Drusilla’s company, although no one ever saw her even approach Caligula, never mind speak to him. No one remarked upon Scherezade’s return, but they did find it curious that she was seventy and yet looked no younger than she did at age twenty seven. Public opinion suspected it was simply within a magi’s power to change appearance, and no one probed further.

As for the matter of Solomon: this conviction of his came three years into his rule, after he recovered from a serious illness. Drusilla awoke me, pounding on my door, eyes wide with fear, saying that I had been called for and must, _must_ go to the Emperor as quickly as I could. She trembled, and I helped her into my room before running towards Caligula’s bedroom. When I entered, he was seated in his bed, looking down as if from on high. I knew, then and there, to throw myself on the floor, treating him not as a king of Riem, but as one of those from the east, that declare heritage from this-or-that ancient magi. Funny that Postumus had never acted in such a manner.

“You’re late,” he said, looking down at me.

I apologised immediately, saying: “Forgive me. If I did not have my limp, I would have been here even before you called for me!” I continued, “If only the joy in seeing you well again could cure my ailment!”

“I was not sick, uncle. I was undergoing a reawakening. My rukh was connecting to that of another, much more ancient than myself. A painful process, but I have come out of it with greater wisdom, for Solomon has been born again in me. His spirit is now mine - which you have so correctly guessed in knowing to bow at once in my presence.” He was pleased, and I knew to say nothing. Caligula then added: “Perhaps in retrospect, the matter should have been obvious. After all, I was in Germania during that soldier rebellion and helped my father to put it down, thus saving Riem.” And here he had been somewhat correct - when Germanicus did indeed put down that rebellion, Caligula became the unofficial standard that was rallied around, such was the love the troops had for him. “Solomon had a less illustrious childhood than that.” Here he continued to sing his own praises, so much that I will not record them here. He did however say that he would not give Livia her request of being written into the history books as the emperor after Drusus. When he had finished, I asked of him: “How, Solomon, am I to serve you, and how is Riem to serve you?”

He was delighted at being called Solomon, and told me such. “I shall keep my secret a little longer, although you may continue to refer to me by that name. Tell the guards this, but no others, for the time being.”

“I shall,” I promised, “And I shall make offerings so that you might continue to provide us wisdom.”

I left then, dismissed, and told the guards thus: “He is to be called Solomon now, as he believes that Solomon’s rukh is within him. Don’t tell anyone. Although maybe inform Drusilla, if he hasn’t already.”

Now, this conviction was brought immediately to Scheherazade's attention, by none other than Caligula himself. She was rumoured to have simply nodded and left, and she confirmed this for me herself when she came to visit me two years later. I had, at the time, moved from the palace into a small home in Riem proper, due to a false attempt to be completely and utterly destitute, thus avoiding the proscriptions that Caligula enacted to increase the state’s purse. Calpurnia had been right, and she came to live with me there, along with a freedwoman who once belonged to my mother. My mother had killed herself shortly after Caligula became Solomon, due to his behaviour and her anger that the people of Riem accepted his claims, and that Scherezade sat doing nothing. My mother’s death was honourable, done with her own hand. Shortly after her passing, my niece Drusilla was killed soon after - by Caligula’s himself, if you believed the rumours. No one can confirm or deny this truth, as Caligula did not permit anyone to see the body.

To return to Scheherazade’s visit. She asked Calpurnia and our freedwoman to leave, and spoke to me directly, saying: “What do you make of these times, Claudius?”

It felt like dinner with Livia again. “I remain surprised that Riem will accept Solomon as emperor,” I said. “I keep expecting a new Brutus to step forward, overthrow this monarchy, and restore the republic.”

“Few could manage the aftermath,” she informed me. Her eyes rested less on me and instead went through me, divining. “And civil wars would begin again, ending the peace that Augustus brought. I promised him to maintain his legacy - the calm is part of it.”

I nearly asked why she was content to let Caligula remain emperor, but I stopped myself. I now understood my grandmother’s assertion that Scherezade would let Caligula rule without interruption. “I see,” I said to her instead. “May I ask why you have come here, then? Respectfully.”

Scherezade did not reply for a moment. “Curiosity,” she said, finally. “Thank you for your hospitality, Claudius. It was scant enough.”

At that, she left, although she returned to visit every few months - asking after my opinion on this or that political matter. She always cast a spell of silence around us before beginning, and she left usually within an hour. Much of the conversation reminded me of my schoolboy days, with my tutor having me run through the logic or rhetoric of a particular argument, and I was unsure what to make of it. She never took food or drink from me, but every time she left, it looked as if some burden had been removed from her shoulders. 

X.

This brings me now to the matter of Caligula’s assassination. In writing this, I will be clear, lest later historians suspect that I was involved in the plot, as I had the most to gain by his death. 

Caligula angered the Senate, and all other noblemen, and there were various conspiracies that attempted to end his life. It was the one planned by the Praetorian guard, Cassius Chaerea in particular, that succeeded. Caligula had a tendency to be cruel to those closest to him - I will not waste ink documenting the number of times he would play pranks on me, or else humiliate me in front of others - and assumed that none would raise a hand to him because of his status of being Solomon himself. Thus he insulted Cassius Chaerea every chance he had. This, along with Caligula’s general disgraceful behaviour, drove the plot, and indeed its existence was well known to everyone but my nephew.

The deed was done during a particular play held in Augustus’ honour. Caligula was addressing the acting troupe under the place where they would be playing (this was within the imperial palace) when the conspirators rushed at him. He was struck thirty three times, and died from the number of blows. I myself heard the commotion from near-by, but did not think to investigate until I saw Scherezade hurry past me, holding her dress up so that she might run. Behind her were the other guards that Caligula employed - Germans, loyal only to him - and I thought to follow, not realizing that it would risk my own safety.

The scene I found was madness. Upon seeing Caligula dead, the Germans had gone into a fit of rage, as they do. Scheherazade was bleeding from her side, but rather than do nothing, she was repelling the barbarians with great vines that came from seemingly nowhere, holding them in place. A number of conspirators had fled already - they killed Caligula’s wife Caesonia and their only child Julia Drusilla, I later found out - and those that remained now cowered in the corner. It was, for all of us there, the first time we had seen Scheherazade act as a soldier, beholding the infinite magoi that comes with the position of being a magi. 

“I will announce Caligula’s death at the games to be held tomorrow,” she said to the room at large. “And that Claudius will succeed him.” Her word was law, and the panic in the room muted itself. The conspirators were told to leave, the Germans left in their restraints, and Scherezade began to walk out of the corridor, motioning for me to follow. I did so, surprised that she slowed her pace to match mine.

“Don’t,” she said sternly, as we walked, “think that this may be a means to return to a republic.”

“You have made it clear that such a thing is impossible in other conversations,” I replied. “But I do want a republic. Why not assume the role of Emperor yourself? Save for the period you were absent, you and the Emperor were equals.”

“A magi cannot rule,” was the response, coupled with: “I respect that this is the family that Augustus wished for his successors to be drawn from. I do not object if you wish to restore the equality between the Emperor and Senate, Claudius, but know that a true republic has been closed off to Riem since Augustus won at Actium.”

She was right, of course, and continues to be right. Augustus - and Scheherazade - had made Riem accustomed to the presence of an Emperor, and with no citizens to remember the days of the republic, there was no desire to return to a government that in its twilight years had done nothing but foster civil war after civil war. Once after my reign had began, I asked if a monarchy had been the plan from the beginning. Scherezade looked at me, laughed, and said that she did not know, adding that often times the rukh of a king candidate meant that the individual in question had ambition, rather than true wisdom. The former, she added, made things much more interesting.

Thus began the ten years and fifty three days of my reign.

**Author's Note:**

> -A very happy Yuletide to you, hellscabanaboy. I hope this fills your request!  
> -Naturally, this is based off of the book I Claudius by Robert Graves - albeit in a fairly abridged format.  
> -Tiberius Claudius Drusus Nero Germanicus is Emperor Claudius’ full name. For the purpose of this fic, the name Tiberius was removed, since Tiberius was never emperor and thus there would be no need for Claudius to take Tiberius’ name.  
> -The prologue of this fic is, essentially, cut whole cloth from the opening of I Claudius. This was done to maintain the pastiche of the fic.  
> -Locations: [The map here](http://forums.animesuki.com/showthread.php?t=104225&page=42) was a great help, and I can only thank my beta S. for pointing me towards it. Cathargo is pretty obviously Carthage, and the Dark Continent has long implied to be Africa in canon. This meant I was comfortable with making the Heliohaput kingdom be the equivalent to Egypt, and suspecting that there is more territory north of Riem that would correspond to Germania or else Scandinavia, as well as entering Etruria and Gaul into the picture - if only to help the use of Roman history along here. All of the geographic speculation can be jossed at any point, canon-wise, admittedly.  
> -[Roxana the Great](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roxana) and [Roxandria](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alexandria,_Egypt)  
> -[Dari](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Darius_III)[opolis](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perspolis)  
> -[Galati](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gaul), [Tyrrhenia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Etruria)  
> -Germania is less cleverly disguised than real-world places in this fic. There are a few reasons for it: 1. The names used in this fic are shorthand to indicate the historical figures that are being referred to. Changing Germanicus’ name would impact that shorthand and make it difficult to follow for those who are familiar with this period in history. 2. The tribes of Germania had no unified name until the Romans who used Germania to refer to their land rather than all the tribes as a whole, meaning that there was nothing to piggyback off of in regards to a language previous to Latin (as done with Etruria in this piece.) 3. I did not wish to pick a specific tribe and use their name in place of Germania’s. This relates back to the comment about using shorthand to indicate historical figures.  
> -The German's serpents are based on [Jörmungandr](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/J%C3%B6rmungandr), the world serpent in Norse mythology.
> 
> This fic contains a lot more smaller references that I could annotate, but it would take just as long to do that as it did to write this. I hope, at the very least, that other people who are familiar with I Claudius get a kick out of the juxtaposition of the book with Riem, and again: I hope that you like the fic, hellscabanaboy. It was a joy to write.


End file.
